You have made us for Yourself,
and our hearts are restless
until they rest in You.
It’s a warm Saturday morning. I’m listening to Audrey Assad’s song “Restless,” inspired by the words of Augustine. I have a few hours to kill before I need to walk to the mall for a quick haircut. Then off to pick up Daphne and Gladys to attend our friends’ wedding after lunch. My barong is dry-cleaned ready. I just need to press my pants and undershirt and maybe shine my black shoes.
I’ve been asked to serve as liturgist during the wedding ceremony later. Since last night, while strolling around the mall, I’ve been pondering about how to help the wedding guests take a worshipful stance during the ceremony this afternoon because, I believe, the wedding of Christ-committed people is not just a social event but a solemn occasion that provides an opportunity to worship, to glimpse the mysterious love of the self-sacrificing Bridegroom for His bride, the Church.
Augustine has beautifully lent words to the truth that God, the Great Lover, has created us, His Beloved, for Himself. Our hearts have been fashioned to be fully satisfied by and in Him. And yet we are an unfaithful lover, abandoning the embrace of God in favor of the caresses of lesser loves. Soon enough we find that none can truly calm our restlessness, except God.
I’ve been feeling restless the past few days. Not sure why, but I have a few clues. This isn’t new, the restlessness, but I know better now than to passively yield to its pull which can easily suck me into despair; I know now that I must “find rest, O my soul, in God alone.”
If restlessness is a compass, a pointer, then I pray that God grant me, and all of us restless ones, the wisdom to let it bring us to the heart of God, the only place where we can truly rest. And on the way we worship and celebrate the manifold ways the Great Lover draws us to Himself despite ourselves.
Without You I am hopeless
Tell me who You are,
You are the keeper of my heart
~Audrey Assad, “Restless”